[intro music]
Em Schulz: 'Tis August.
Christine Schiefer: It's those dog days. Dog days of summer.
Em Schulz: Daugust.
Christine Schiefer: What?
Em Schulz: Dog? August.
[laughter]
Christine Schiefer: Oh I did not get it. I'm so... I was like, what's Daugust? Is that like your new religion that we're starting?
Em Schulz: It's like, what's up dog? Yeah. [laughter]
Christine Schiefer: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Em Schulz: What's up dog? By the way, I tried, uh smells like updog to Allison, and she literally went, what is that? I don't understand what that is.
Christine Schiefer: No.
Em Schulz: What is that? And I went, I went, you have to be kidding me, I was like...
Christine Schiefer: She's literally watched The Office like probably more times than the average person.
Em Schulz: Every, every day we stray further from each other in the world of brain rot. And like, I just, I, it's very upsetting because she doesn't unders-, it's like we're, it's like all of a sudden there's a language barrier. Half the things I say, she's like, what are you talking about? Like okay.
Christine Schiefer: I do get that with Blaise. And then on the off chance when he figured out who Chappell Roan was before I did it, it like he just won't, he like won't let me. Like, he got a win. You know?
Em Schulz: Uh-huh.
Christine Schiefer: Like a pop culture win and it's so fucking annoying. So be so careful Em.
Em Schulz: I know.
Christine Schiefer: Be so careful. 'cause like the second they get something over you [laughter], It's like, oh.
Em Schulz: Those people, the second they get, uh but it's true, the second that they have a, a moment in the spotlight. Oh my God. But then the irony is because that Allison's always, maybe not always, whenever she has like a good bout of TikTok, she'd come, we come back to a, a nice common ground.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah. That's what it is. Yeah.
Em Schulz: But in the moments where she does learn something before me, I hear about it until it's outdated information again. So I'm like, okay, well you just.
Christine Schiefer: Oh, you're like, you're already behind. So, yeah nice try.
Em Schulz: Yeah. It's like you were so ahead that you became behind talking about how ahead you were. So.
Christine Schiefer: You like lapped me and then all of a sudden you were in the last place.
Em Schulz: Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: All of a sudden [laughter] Nobody knows how it happened. Umm, yeah. That's how I feel about it all. And umm, I, so I get it. Em, I do because I'm always like.
Em Schulz: Thank you.
Christine Schiefer: Ugh Blaise, get with the program. And then the one time he- I was like, who's Chappell Roan? He was like, he, I just saw that glint in his eye. I mean, this was a while ago but...
Em Schulz: I feel like you you could hear the silverware drop out of his hands. Like you don't know who Chappell Roan is?
Christine Schiefer: The clatter. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah [laughter] Uh, so, and that's what it is. He's been on TikTok and reels and I'm like, this is the danger zone 'cause he finds this shit out.
Em Schulz: Well, if he's on reels, he is not ahead, I promise you.
Christine Schiefer: Well, I know, I told him that too. So I kind of win all the time no matter what. 'cause I'm like, he goes, I saw this TikTok. I'm like, did you or did you see a reel?
Em Schulz: Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: And then it's usually a reel [laughter] umm, he, he's like, well, I don't use TikTok, so, 'cause it's so addicting. So he deleted it and now he just goes on reels. And I'm like, so you're just using like TikTok lite?
Em Schulz: Well, not, so you're using like really delayed TikTok. That's like saying I don't want to like, I can't even think of a good example. It's like oh I.
Christine Schiefer: It's like diluted TikTok. It's like...
Em Schulz: I don't like my fully charged phone. I'd rather stick with my 10% phone. Like what? It's like...
Christine Schiefer: Yeah. But it's, and it's also like you're wasting the same amount of time, right? Like you're not winning the.
Em Schulz: Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: The struggle. Like you're still on an app. You might as well be on the good one if you're wasting an hour.
Em Schulz: Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: On an app. You know. Umm.
Em Schulz: You get it. You get it.
Christine Schiefer: I do. Thank you for saying that. Umm, 'cause I, I felt a little, I felt behind this month, umm, on all the cool pop culture things. So [laughter], you know, here we are.
Em Schulz: Well.
Christine Schiefer: Anyway, welcome to the dog Days of summer, everybody to Daugust, uh. We are...
Em Schulz: To Daugust, Daugust 1st.
Christine Schiefer: Melting probably.
Em Schulz: I am already.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah.
Em Schulz: It's, it literally, we, Allison and I so many times have wanted to do something in the last couple weekends. And then we just look at the temperature and it's like, oh, I guess we're inside again.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah, stay in the house. Its...
Em Schulz: Like it was like it 93.
Christine Schiefer: It was delightful at first 'cause Leona would be like, let's go ri- for a bike ride. And we'd go like five feet and she'd go, oh, nevermind. It's too hot. And I was like, yes, let's go back inside [laughter].
Em Schulz: She's one of us. Thank God.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah, exactly. And then, but then she'd go carry me home and my bike and I'm like, oh my God, thank God it's only five feet. I'd barely survive.
Em Schulz: Oh. That's when you teach her natural consequences. It's like...
Christine Schiefer: Yeah. Like well, good luck with that. Uh.
Em Schulz: It's like well you ride that home, I'll see you there. The faster you ride home, the faster we both have ice cream in our jammies.
Christine Schiefer: Oh thank God.
Em Schulz: So you do something about that. Wow. No, I, uh, there have been a few times where Allison is very similar to Leona. Not, I'm not trying to infantalize her. That sounded really weird, but I meant she also is like, let's go outside. And then five minutes later she's like, never nevermind. I don't wanna do this.
Christine Schiefer: It was a bad idea. Yeah.
Em Schulz: She, umm, she got, I, I've said this before I think on the podcast, but I bought a bike recently and umm, I bought a bike on the last really lovely weekend of Los Angeles. And I was like, I can't wait. I was like, so jazzed. I was like, I'm going, I'm gonna like, there's like, Burbank is a really bikeable area. So I was like, oh, we're gonna do this. And Allison does roller skating. And I was like, we're gonna have a bunch of outdoor dates, it's gonna be lovely. And then boom, the second I swipe my credit card, it was 105 degrees outside and I went, never mind.
Christine Schiefer: And then the bike sellers were like, haha, now they all go on sale and you missed out. He, he, he, he, he.
[laughter]
Em Schulz: Yeah. And so one time Allison was like, we should actually go roller skating because like, you bought an expensive bike. Like, I haven't done my rollerblading, my roller skating. I really wanna do it. And we went out for five seconds and we looked at each other and I went, we gotta get back in that car. We gotta go home. This is too much.
Christine Schiefer: No. And like with all the like strapping yourself in the rollers. Like, forget it.
Em Schulz: Yes.
Christine Schiefer: Come on, come on.
Em Schulz: That's why I didn't get rollers. Well, I also, 'cause I have really bad flat feet, but if if even if I had perfect arches, I'd be like, I'm not wasting my time.
Christine Schiefer: It's not, it's so, it's so sweaty. I don't wanna do that. No, no, no.
Em Schulz: Yeah. I wanna hop on that bike and I wanna hop off that bike.
Christine Schiefer: I wanna si-, I wanna be sitting even when I'm exercising. Do you know what I mean? Yeah.
Em Schulz: Yes. I wanna be gliding. And also the best part is when I got the bike, it really wasn't for exercise. It was truly so I could glide and feel wind on me um.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah. Well that's the best part.
Em Schulz: But everyone's like, but every single person is like, oh, you're doing it for exercise? And I'm like, Mm-Hmm. Mm-Hmm. Yep. That's exactly right. Uh.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah. It's called a fan, but it's much more work [laughter] and it's outside [laughter] Yeah. And I think that logic is...
Em Schulz: It's a man-made fan.
Christine Schiefer: Flawless. Umm, a man-made fan is already man-made, but it's fine. [laughter] I do understand what you're saying and I do, I think I just needed to say that. So that we didn't get tweets about it. Umm, even though I don't think anyone uses Twitter anymore. I don't know anymore though, because I've been off TikTok all month. So who the fuck do, what what the fuck do I know? I'll ask Blaise. I'll be like.
Em Schulz: Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: What's the deal? Tell me.
Em Schulz: What do the... What do the Reels say about TikTok? Tell me.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah. Yeah. Uh, give me the, give me the up-, the scoop. Anyway.
Em Schulz: Well, what's your plan this August? What do you got going on?
Christine Schiefer: Well, oh my gosh. Today as we record this July 19th, the Glass Animals new album came out. And if, I don't know if I've ever talked about this, they're probably my number one band, favorite band ever. Umm, and their new album released. And so my, we're going to a concert, I think it's in August. It's either in August or or September. Umm, the Glass Animals Concert right by my house. I'm so excited. Uh. Uh, well actually I'm, now I'm triangulating myself. Umm, again, but anyway.
Em Schulz: Was it state what? Cincinnati or Newport, Kentucky. That I feel like that's kind of already known by you, right?
Christine Schiefer: Oh wait, I'm wrong. Actually, it's at Riverbend, which is where I saw Fall Out Boy. 'cause, you know, umm.
Em Schulz: Oh, perfect.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah, so it'll be really fun. I'm really excited. I think that's in August. I'm not positive, but it's like all I can think about, umm, because they're just my favorite. Yeah.
Em Schulz: The whole time you're there, you're gonna go, we needed this, we needed this.
Christine Schiefer: Yes, we needed this. I deserve one fun little treat, you know? Umm, so I'm very excited. That'll be like, that's just gonna be, uh, a very big deal for me. And my sister, uh, is coming too, and she, she loves them and it'll be really fun. Anyway, so if you're there, I'll be there. Come find me.
Em Schulz: Cool.
Christine Schiefer: Uh, anyway, umm, yeah, so what we do every first of the month is we read listeners submitted stories, umm, anything creepy, uh, or tangentially related to the podcast. Eva said that she went on quite a journey, as she called it this month, and found, uh which this is maybe a first, I'm not sure, but like, a bunch of true crime stories, like real true crime stories. And I feel like we never veer that far into true crime stories on the listener episodes.
Em Schulz: Mm-Hmm.
Christine Schiefer: Just because people submit, tend to submit ghost stories understandably more often.
Em Schulz: I feel like more people have ghost stories than I at least I hope so than true crime stories.
Christine Schiefer: Or or like willing to share them. Yeah. Or like, feel like they can share it in like a fun, like context.
Em Schulz: Yes. Yes.
Christine Schiefer: You know, I can understand if you go through a traumatic crime event, you're not like, I mean, some people really are.
Em Schulz: Can't wait to write it in. Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: Which I love. Uh, so don't get me wrong, but I'm sure there are, you know, fewer of them for that reason. So anyway, umm, Em who, who goes first this time?
Em Schulz: Uh, I can go first.
Christine Schiefer: Okay.
Em Schulz: Umm, especially because this first story is from someone named Loki, and Loki has a double pronoun, so.
Christine Schiefer: Heyyy.
Em Schulz: I'm really, really feeling it. Uh.
Christine Schiefer: Loki. Lowkey has two pronouns. So.
Em Schulz: Loki high key has two pronouns.
Christine Schiefer: Mm-Hmm.
Em Schulz: [laughter], uh, and the subject line is how I found out my family was connected to the mob.
Christine Schiefer: I lov- Em loves these, these are very Em coded though. Like, umm.
Em Schulz: I Yes.
Christine Schiefer: Mob ones.
Em Schulz: And I think, I don't know, I don't know how I, my family is affiliated with the mob and not in like a, oh, they were part of the mob, but like they owed the mob money and were probably like getting knocks on the door all the time. I don't know how that happened, but I've always heard stories of like, we were on the run from the mob, so.
Christine Schiefer: That's like even scarier than being a part of the mob, right? Like, ooh.
Em Schulz: Yeah. Well, whoever was running around, they're dead now, so hopefully it's not like, you know, they're just looking for...
Christine Schiefer: You're you're like triangulating some distant ancestor.
Em Schulz: Right.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah.
Em Schulz: Umm, but anyway, uh, this, this is how apparently Loki's family found out that they hated my family, I guess [laughter] Okay. "Hey, all you lovely peoples. I have been a listener for about a year now and binged it to get caught up in that timeframe. And I keep hearing people share about their grandparents knowing a mob or mafia boss, a mob member or mafia boss. So I figured I'd share a story. My mom told me that she of course told me not to tell people." Great.
Christine Schiefer: [laughter] Uh oh, okay.
Em Schulz: Okay. If the mob comes after us.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah.
Em Schulz: Know that it was not me. Uh, it was my grandpa, but was not me.
Christine Schiefer: It was Em's grandpa [laughter]
Em Schulz: Uh, this was...
Christine Schiefer: Do those debts get wiped when you die? I bet that's a real thing people talk about. Yeah.
Em Schulz: That's, I'm saying, I'm like, am I, should they, should I be, are they looking for me? I don't know.
Christine Schiefer: Well now they know about this fancy new bike you have, you know, be careful.
Em Schulz: If the mob only steals my bike, they can have my bike.
Christine Schiefer: That would be the wildest mob ever. Yeah.
Em Schulz: That would be like a Bill Murray story. Have you ever heard about the Bill Murray stories.
Christine Schiefer: Yes. Yes.
Em Schulz: Where like, he does ridiculous shit and then just says one will ever believe you.
Christine Schiefer: And says no one will believe you. Yeah.
Em Schulz: And then just walks off into the sunset. I...
Christine Schiefer: If Bill Murray stole my bike, I would just die happy. So.
Em Schulz: I literally, but no one would ever believe you, so.
Christine Schiefer: That's fine. I don't even care. I just would love the story so much.
Em Schulz: Yeah. [laughter], uh, okay, "This was probably back in the '70s or '80s. I don't have an exact timeframe. One of my aunts was on a date with someone who attempted to assault her on said date."
Christine Schiefer: Great.
Em Schulz: "She being the badass that she is, proceeded to shoot him in the leg." America.
Christine Schiefer: She came prepared for her date.
Em Schulz: She did. "And then provided medical aid until EMTs showed up." So I like how she was like, you deserve that, but also, hang on, you're bleeding out.
Christine Schiefer: She's like, she's like, there there. I'll put pressure on it. Fuck you.
Em Schulz: Yeah. I, I don't know what the story is, but I'm, I think I'm on her side. Umm.
Christine Schiefer: Uh, I do.
Em Schulz: Of course.
Christine Schiefer: She was almost assaulted and then she shot him.
Em Schulz: That's true. I was thinking like, did like she punch him for like what, like was this like the, the final step or was this the first step? Did she just go straight for the gun and that? Either way I think I'm fine. I'm fine with how it worked.
Christine Schiefer: Oh I see. Oh, okay. I understand what you're saying. Yeah.
Em Schulz: "Of course she was brought in to give a statement since she shot someone. And the DA at the time apparently didn't want the extra work. He told her to plead guilty to assaulting. Uh, she, he told her to plead guilty to assaulting someone with a deadly weapon, serve a few months, and then they just seal the records and she'd go on with her life. She, of course, told him exactly what he could do with that idea. Since she was acting in self-defense, the DA upset..."
Christine Schiefer: She pulled out another gun and pointed at the DA.
Em Schulz: Right, nobody is safe. Uh, "the DA upset that she didn't just want to do his idea, uh, so that he didn't have to go through the hassle of a court case and decided, he decided to press charges on her and go out of his way to cause issues with her case." So he pressed charges on her. Okay. "Eventually, like her torn blouse," like her torn blouse mysteriously, oh my god. Sorry. I'm reading this for the first time with all of you audience, and so the sentence I'm, I didn't see this coming. Okay. "Evidence, like her torn blouse, mysteriously went missing from evidence lockup..."
Christine Schiefer: [gasp]
Em Schulz: "And she wasn't given all the information she needed, and her public defender never prepped her to take the stand. It was a real nightmare for my mom's family at the time. Flash forward, and my grandpa had a group of men knocking on the door to the house. They told him that there were mob ties in the family, though if they told him who my mom never learned who it was and that they'd be more happy to make the case against my aunt just disappear."
Christine Schiefer: [gasp]
Em Schulz: So they were like, we are not telling you who or what's going on, but we can help fix things if you'd like.
Christine Schiefer: We can fix the problem.
Em Schulz: We can fix the problem. And I would be like, what is the fucking catch? Please [laughter]
Christine Schiefer: For sure. It sounds very deal with the devil. Like, uh.
Em Schulz: Yeah, "my grandpa politely turned them down since offers like that don't come free." That's exactly right.
Christine Schiefer: Thank you!
Em Schulz: "And he knew they'd turn to someone in the family to pay that debt back later. And he was mainly concerned about it being my mom since she had just started her career at a local jail as a corrections officer." I see what's going on now.
Christine Schiefer: Oh.
Em Schulz: They they wanted to do the family a favor. So then the corrections officer.
Christine Schiefer: The corrections officer.
Em Schulz: In the family had to do them favors. Mm-hmm.
Christine Schiefer: Owed them. Yeah, that's a dangerous slippery slope.
Em Schulz: "Later on, an uncle tried to do a family tree and quickly dropped that project and refused to tell anyone what he found." Oh my God.
Christine Schiefer: Uh-Oh.
Em Schulz: The way that I, I would call a Christine Schiefer and I'd be like, [laughter] I need you to hack into my uncle's ancestry.com immediately.
Christine Schiefer: And then I'd go miss-, I'd go missing. And you'd be like, oopsie. Anyway, I'm glad I called Christine to do that. [laughter]
Em Schulz: Kind of. Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah.
Em Schulz: Umm.
Christine Schiefer: You'd be right. [laughter]
Em Schulz: "My mom also learned that anyone else who ever tried to do a family tree also quickly stopped. So I'm assuming they found those mob ties pretty quickly and chose not to probe too deep." Your family sounds like they would not get along with my family because...
Christine Schiefer: Why are they, I wanna know what, why would you not immediately dig into that?
Em Schulz: If I said, Oh, I'm dropping the family tree. I found out some shit the way that my mother would get the first flight over.
Christine Schiefer: Literally.
Em Schulz: And steal my laptop, look through everything. She'd call all, all of her sisters, all of her brothers, her mom, sh- everyone would learn everything they could about this.
Christine Schiefer: The only way I would imagine I would drop something like that is if somebody threatened me, you know?
Em Schulz: Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: Like somebody said like, drop it or something bad will happen. Then I'd be like, fine for now, [laughter]
Em Schulz: Yeah. Exactly. Like, or maybe like, did you find out, the only way I can think is like you're related to someone who's still very alive. And like you're afraid that...
Christine Schiefer: Right. You don't wanna connect to them.
Em Schulz: They're gonna get notifications on ancestry.com.
Christine Schiefer: It's like add friend on Facebook. Yeah.
Em Schulz: Yeah. So like, you don't wanna f- you don't want them to find out that you found out something.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah.
Em Schulz: That's the only way that I could see this going. 'Cause if the only thing is you just lost interest on your own. Bullshit.
Christine Schiefer: You just don't wanna know. I mean, oh my gosh.
Em Schulz: Yeah. I absolutely can't relate to that.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah.
Em Schulz: Umm, okay. "So anyone else who has done this has quickly dropped and chose not to probe too deep, which of course has only made me all the more intrigued and increased my urge to also start a family tree." That's exactly right, Loki.
Christine Schiefer: Thank you Loki.
Em Schulz: Thank you so much. And unless you were born with the name Loki, I sense that a lot of people are not born at birth or, or at birth, given the name Loki, you could probably go in like identity-wise. Like, you could be like, you could like, like no one's looking for Loki on the family tree. You know what I mean? So.
Christine Schiefer: Great point, great point.
Em Schulz: So if someone is, uh.
Christine Schiefer: It's like a little bit of a shield from like distant relatives who might not recognize the name.
Em Schulz: Yeah you've got a little disguise going on, maybe. So.
Christine Schiefer: And that being said, Em and I have no liability whatsoever if something...
Em Schulz: Right.
Christine Schiefer: Terrible mob wise happens. [laughter]
Em Schulz: If we find out that the mob went after a Loki, all of a sudden I'm gonna go, Ooh. Ooh.
Christine Schiefer: Ah! [laughter] That was a bad advice we gave. Okay.
Em Schulz: Uh, "maybe one day I'll figure it out and can update you on who it was. Uh, that I find, I find it odd that some mob boss remembers an old acquaintance enough to keep track of their family, but said family never learned about it. I have a bunch of fun other stories that I've learned from my mom, from both her children, her childhood, and her career in the jail system, umm, until she retired. But that's a story for another time." Of course.
Christine Schiefer: I'm sure she's seen some shit. I mean, the fact that she just shot someone in self-defense and then went about her day, you know.
Em Schulz: Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Christine Schiefer: And tried to, tried to resuscitate him or, or, you know, help him from bleeding out. I mean, woof sounds like quite a person.
Em Schulz: Uh, uh, Loki ends this with asking for you to give Gio a good little pat.
Christine Schiefer: Oh, I will. He went to the vet today. He got a shot. So...
Em Schulz: Oh no.
Christine Schiefer: I will give him, it's for his allergies, so it's not anything crazy, but, umm, he's...
Em Schulz: He's so fucking bougie the way that he's got allergies. What like what's he sneezing about?
Christine Schiefer: It's like outbreak. No, it's not that like their skin gets all, you know, like.
Em Schulz: Oh, it's his licking thing? Like his...
Christine Schiefer: Yeah. They chew their paws and then they bleed and stuff. It's like he gets like the, the, the, umm, I think it's really common, at least in the Midwest, umm, for dogs to need of these fucking shots and they're expensive. Haha.
Em Schulz: I've been thinking about, uh, Gio recently because, uh, where were we? We would, we were somewhere just recently and we had all those little stickers on the bushes, came home with us like, Oh my God.
Christine Schiefer: [gasp] Oh, those things. Those little brambles.
Em Schulz: The little brambles. And all I can think about is the first time you got that house, and not, not the house you're in, but the house here.
Christine Schiefer: He dove into that fucking...
Em Schulz: And he, there's nothing he loved more than run- rolling around in brambles and you couldn't even pet him. He would just be...
Christine Schiefer: 'Cause he knows then that I'm gonna pet him for three hours.
Em Schulz: A big matted mess.
Christine Schiefer: Trying to pull them out. And he's like, now I get your solo attention for three straight hours.
Em Schulz: No, I would just take the shears to him and I'd be like, "Oh, you thought you won?" Okay.
Christine Schiefer: Let's shave. Shave you. Just shave you.
Em Schulz: Just... Now you're nakey. Now you're nakey.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah-ha. Anyway, I have a story here from Mary Catherine. She/her, umm, and isn't that the kind of like, it sounds like a name from of a nun, doesn't it, Mary?
Em Schulz: It sure does.
Christine Schiefer: Sister Mary Catherine.
Em Schulz: I would, I would love a nun to listen to this show.
Christine Schiefer: I know. Wouldn't that be nice? Uh, I would be so scared though. [laughter] Okay. This is the subject, is my mom the cop and her brother the murderer.
Em Schulz: Uh-oh.
Christine Schiefer: Uh-oh. The murderer slash serial rapist. Oh boy.
Em Schulz: Wow. Okay. So we've got a, uh, an interesting Thanksgiving setup is what I'm hearing at...
Christine Schiefer: Yeah. This is gonna be awkward dinner table conversation for sure.
Em Schulz: Definitely, definitely.
Christine Schiefer: "Note there is an Old Cold Case Files episode on the story I'm about to tell you. It's currently on Netflix as part of their classic series. This was in, uh, sent in May, 2023. So I, I hope it's still there, but, umm, it's titled Cross Country Connection." Okay. So we can all watch along later tonight. "Anyway, my uncle Mark Francis Elder was arrested in 2005 for the rape of several sex workers in Daytona Beach, Florida."
Em Schulz: Oof.
Christine Schiefer: "After his arrest, we found out he was responsible for the death of a woman in California in the early '80s. The story goes, one of the sex workers in Daytona Beach went to the police after my uncle offered her a ride, which turned into a rape. She reported it and had a rape kit done at the hospital. The detective on the case who interviewed the sex worker while she was in jail later, (the detective had been unable to find her and was finally able to get information from her when she was arrested), and while speaking..."
Em Schulz: Oh, wow.
Christine Schiefer: "With the officer, other sex workers who were in the jail at the time overheard her story and had similar experiences with a man by the same description."
Em Schulz: [gasp] Oh, well that's like a, in like the... Least fucked up way possible, but like, that's pretty like...
Christine Schiefer: Convenient timing.
Em Schulz: Perfect timing. Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah, it is, it is. Umm, "police started watching out for a man in a dark van with no windows in the area. One night an officer," I mean, I feel like you should, the police should be watching out for that any area all the time.
Em Schulz: Right?
Christine Schiefer: But That's just me.
Em Schulz: I was like, hang on a second. [laughter] Call Me crazy.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah, nothing good happens. I think, uh, in a, in a blacked out van like that, "one night an officer spotted a van that fit the description and pulled it over for a broken taillight. The officer noticed a partially smoked joint in the ashtray and confiscated it. I believe he played it cool and acted as though he was letting my uncle off with a warning most likely, so he wouldn't leave." Oh yeah. They didn't wanna tip him off.
Em Schulz: Mm-hmm.
Christine Schiefer: Like I just Got your fucking DNA dude.
Em Schulz: Mm-hmm.
Christine Schiefer: "Wouldn't leave the Daytona area until they could test the joint for DNA and make sure this was the guy they were looking for. So they tested the DNA. Not..."
Em Schulz: So smart.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah, that is to just play it cool and be like anyway.
Em Schulz: That's some Mariska shit.
Christine Schiefer: It is. Like, just go home. You're like in fear for, you're like, you don't wanna give him any ideas.
Em Schulz: Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: [gasp] Ooh. So scary. "They tested the DNA and not only did it match the rapes that were recently reported, but it matched DNA from the California murder in the '80s." Holy shit.
Em Schulz: Mmm.
Christine Schiefer: Imagine getting like all those dings and being like, success and then like seeing a whole nother ding across the country. Like.
Em Schulz: Ugh.
Christine Schiefer: Shit. Now we've solved a murder too. "My mom and dad were both Florida highway patrol officers, and one weekend my mom had to go to Tallahassee for a course. On her way to Tallahassee she stopped at my grandparents' house for a quick visit. Her brother was there and she knew he had some warrants out for his arrest. She let him know that if she saw him again, she would have to arrest him." Imagine...
Em Schulz: [laughter], you go girl.
Christine Schiefer: Your Sibling is like, I'll let you off this time. I mean, God [laughter], I'd be scared to be her. I, I feel like that brother could get some real vengeance on his sister.
Em Schulz: Well, she had to like think like, oh, what am I gonna say when I get there? Like, this is an awkward situation. Like...
Christine Schiefer: So awkward. Well, I don't know if she knew he was there.
Em Schulz: Oh, oh, oh, oh.
Christine Schiefer: It sounds like... It sounds like this was a surprise visit. And she, like, I, I assume he would've bounced if he knew a patrol, you know, a parole or a highway patrol officer was coming, but I don't know.
Em Schulz: Yeah, I don't know what the rule is there. Like what if like, could she have gone to her parents and been like, like legally, should she have like, gone to her parents and said...
Christine Schiefer: She probably was supposed to...
Em Schulz: Call him over?
Christine Schiefer: Well, she was probably supposed to arrest him when she saw him on the spot...
Em Schulz: Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: But she probably was like, well, here's you're my brother, you know?
Em Schulz: Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: I imagine that's a very tough like, call to make.
Em Schulz: Such a tough call.
Christine Schiefer: Umm, "so she said if you, if she saw him again, she would have to arrest him. I think she was trying to get him to turn himself in, but instead my grandparents bought him a bus ticket to wherever he wanted to go. He settled on San Diego, California. Once in San Diego. He met a woman named Janet, I believe They smoked crack together and then he stabbed her to death over 30 times."
Em Schulz: Mmm.
Christine Schiefer: Jesus fucking Christ. "His blood was found at the scene and was collected as evidence, but of course at the time, DNA evidence was still in the early stages. In the meantime, he met, met and married a sweet woman. They had a kid and decided to move back to Florida to be closer to family. He swore he was a changed man and went so far as to turn himself in on his old warrants When he moved back to Florida. The judge let him off as he seemed to be a family man now. The act didn't last and his marriage to my sweet, sweet aunt fell apart. And not long after that was when he was arrested for the rapes of the women in Daytona and the murder of Janet." Like he did...
Em Schulz: Oh, interesting.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah. That's wild. I feel like you never hear that kind of a...
Em Schulz: And I wonder too, if he like knew he was about to get busted there for some reason. I was like, let's go to Florida. But like, couldn't you pick a different state where you didn't have warrants out for your arrest?
Christine Schiefer: I know. It sounds like, yeah, it sounds like that's kind of a dumb move. Umm, but.
Em Schulz: Yeah, whatever.
Christine Schiefer: I'm glad like he did it, I guess. "I hated being around him as a child, but loved his wife and kids, so I just kind of dealt with him. I remember my mom telling me as a kid that if he ever showed up to our school and said my mom sent him to pick us up to never get in the car with him. He was that kind of creepy." That is a...
Em Schulz: Oh, God.
Christine Schiefer: Oh, Fuck. "My uncle was not tried on the rapes. Instead he was extradited to California where he was found guilty of murder and sentenced to 25 to life. He's up for parole in the next few years." Is Eva trying to get us killed? [laughter]? Like all these stories, I'm like, he's up for parole in the next few years.
Em Schulz: I'm so glad you're telling this story and not me. Oh, My god.
Christine Schiefer: Ah, "And my family's trying to find out what we can do to help keep him in prison. I'm sure I'll be writing you more in the future." I mean, I, I'll sign a petition that's not very helpful, but I'll do it. [laughter], uh, "I'm sure I'll be writing you more in the future. I have many more stories to share. My parents are both police officers and for some time, my dad was a homicide detective, so yeah, there's lots to share. Talk soon. Mary Catherine."
Em Schulz: Wow. Wow. Well, I hope we don't die. I hope we're not, uh, taken in for questioning at some point.
Christine Schiefer: If something happens. Yeah, if you're a criminal that we're [laughter] talking about and you kill us, guess what everyone's gonna know. You did it so... [laughter] Sorry.
Em Schulz: They're gonna play this episode in the courtroom just telling You.
Christine Schiefer: Oh my God. And then we're gonna get so famous, so who cares?
Em Schulz: Oh my God [laughter].
Christine Schiefer: This is me trying to play it cool. Like, you know?
Em Schulz: [laughter] It's like, where's the bright side? Umm.
Christine Schiefer: Even though I'm sweating.
Em Schulz: This, this is from Tara who uses she/her pronouns. Thank you for normalizing pronouns, Tara. And the umm, uh, subject line is Cannibal Soup.
Christine Schiefer: What?!
Em Schulz: Not yet. I am so glad I'm reading this one. Okay. Umm, [laughter]
Christine Schiefer: Cannibal Soup. Oh God. Oh God.
Em Schulz: We, we all know that. Uh, I have questions about cannibalism, so I.
Christine Schiefer: You do.
Em Schulz: I wonder if I'm gonna get any answers today. Okay, here we go. "A few years back, I took my daughter to New York City for her 13th birthday. We stayed at my friend's house on the Lower East Side. My friend is very spiritual and into meditation, reiki, et cetera, and his apartment is set up to feel very serene."
Christine Schiefer: Mmm.
Em Schulz: Love that. Umm, "he has tabletop waterfalls, plants, mandalas on the wall, meditation tables." Dang. Okay, so very serene.
Christine Schiefer: I'm gonna fall asleep just listening to this interior design.
Em Schulz: I like to think that since you were a guest in his house, like he did that, what's the, the little, I don't know the right word for like the.
Christine Schiefer: A sound bath.
Em Schulz: The drum sound bath. Like it just would be next to your pillow and would just kind of.
Christine Schiefer: Just like find the right. Uh, frequency to drift you off to sleep.
Em Schulz: Give you an experience. Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: It's beautiful.
Em Schulz: "When my daughter and I got to New York, he was still at work and we sat quietly in his living room, recuperating from waking up at the buck crack of dawn to catch our flight while we waited for him to get home. Even though his apartment had the illusion of being peaceful, I couldn't help but feel extremely uncomfortable."
Christine Schiefer: Uh, oh. We spoke too soon, Em.
Em Schulz: [gasp] Oh, wow. Yuck. I maybe while you were sleeping he was like staring at in the doorway or something. Umm.
Christine Schiefer: Well, I don't know. I think we're probably gonna find out.
Em Schulz: "I felt as though something bad was going to happen and like there were eyes on me."
Both: [gasp]
Christine Schiefer: What?
Em Schulz: Now it feels weird that it was looking so serene because he like wanted to put on this front. Yuck.
Christine Schiefer: Now we're freaked out. Yeah. That makes it extra creepy that it's so like that there's like waterfalls and shit.
Em Schulz: Yeah. Oh yeah. Oh, "all in all an unsettling feeling. But I chalked it up to being, to it being my anxiety ramping up because of the lack of sleep and exhaustion from the day. The next day I woke up before my daughter and friend and was sitting in the living room and I just couldn't shake the feeling that I had the day before. So I decided to mess around with my Ghost box app that I had on my phone." [laughter]
Christine Schiefer: Are you, me?
Em Schulz: Love that.
Christine Schiefer: Oh my God.
Em Schulz: It's like, hmm, I already have anxiety building up in me. Let's really fuck, fuck, myself over.
Christine Schiefer: Let's just, let's just like tip it. You know? Why not?
Em Schulz: "I wouldn't usually play with this app in my house because I don't wanna open myself up to the paranormal in the comfort of my own home. But, hey, this wasn't my house." [laughter]
Christine Schiefer: Hey! That is me. It does sound like me. Or you actually in this case. 'Cause I, I don't have any problem opening shit up in my house.
Em Schulz: I know that.
[laughter]
Em Schulz: "The moment I, the moment I opened up the app, it started saying things like murder stuck and in the room."
Christine Schiefer: Ew!
Em Schulz: "I never know how much I can trust these man-made apps. And just figured it was made to scare people and I turned it off. Later that night, we were all hanging out in the living room again and I told my friend, 'I don't mean to sound offensive, but do you even, do you ever get a weird feeling here?' He looked at me and started laughing. Well this is the apartment of Daniel Rakowitz and he continued to tell me the story of this man that murdered a woman in the apartment in the late '80s."
Christine Schiefer: [gasp] Oh my God.
Em Schulz: At least it's not your friend. I really, for a second thought that you were like in murderer's apartment.
Christine Schiefer: I know, Em was ready to like throw the friend under the bus [laughter] He wants it to look serene. He's gonna eat you [laughter]
Em Schulz: I was like, he's like getting prepped to like, well that makes sense. Okay, now we, it makes sense a third time of like, uh, he like, just wants to feel some fucking peace in this place.
Christine Schiefer: Yes. He's, he's like, oh, it feels weird in here. Let's like put some Buddha statues around and see what happens. Yeah.
Em Schulz: Yeah. And, I feel bad because for all the work he did to make it serene, it's still obviously not serene enough.
Christine Schiefer: You're like, this place fucking sucks. [laughter], I'm so scared. [laughter]
Em Schulz: "He continued to tell me the story of a man that murdered a woman in his apartment in the late '80s."
Christine Schiefer: [gasp] Jesus.
Em Schulz: "The man left her in the bathtub for days."
Christine Schiefer: [gasp]
Em Schulz: "Boiled her down..."
Christine Schiefer: Oh my God.
Em Schulz: "Made soup out of her, and fed her to his unhoused friends in Tompkins Square Park."
Christine Schiefer: [gasp] What?! The fuck?
Em Schulz: This should be a, "this would be a crazy story for Christina cover in a future episode."
Christine Schiefer: Yeah.
Em Schulz: "So I won't give away too many details, but suffice to say the weird feeling that I had was for a reason. I would always say I, I would say always trust your gut, but I have anxiety all the time and I would rather not believe it [laughter] is because cannibal murderers are watching me 24/7."
Christine Schiefer: Holy shit. Is that the end?
Em Schulz: Yeah. So then when you think, yeah, the end. So in my mind the ghost app is like, was that maybe the victim?
Christine Schiefer: Right. Right. Right.
Em Schulz: Who was saying stuck in the room? Oh God.
Christine Schiefer: [gasp] That's horrifying.
Em Schulz: In my mind I'm like, "Oh, maybe she could sense it because like she's a woman, the victim was a woman. Maybe they like had some like.
Christine Schiefer: There's a kid there or a child. I don't know if it's a child, but like a...
Em Schulz: I don't know how true that is, but in my mind it's like maybe she was trying to reach out to someone with who could have more intuition on that. I don't know.
Christine Schiefer: When I heard the like, uh, the ghost app come out, I thought it was gonna say cannibal soup and I was like, oh that's so scary. And then it's like, no, that was actually a real thing and I was like, that's so much worse.
Em Schulz: Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Christine Schiefer: I was hoping it would just be like a weird like glitch on the fucking app, but oh, that's so fucking sad. Uh, yeah, we should add that to uh, a list to cover. Especially now we have like, umm, you know, a ghost story attached to it. Umm.
Em Schulz: Also feeding it to unhoused people. Oh my God. Eugh.
Christine Schiefer: Like that's the whole thing is sick in so many in like every possible way. Uh, woo. That gives me the shivers. Okay, so I have one here. This is from S she/her and the subject is That person who sat on the serial killer's lap? I wouldn't let him have his underwear.
Em Schulz: What now? Alright, well no wonder you said your name's S because [laughter]
Christine Schiefer: Yeah. I don't blame you.
Em Schulz: Nobody needs to know a damn thing about me. Okay.
Christine Schiefer: "All inclusive Hello." Thank you.
Em Schulz: Very poignant.
Christine Schiefer: I literal had to pause. Very what?
Em Schulz: Very poignant.
Christine Schiefer: Oh, beautiful. Yeah, "I literally had to pause listener episode 62 to write this story. In the episode you talk about John Robinson, the person that might be the Santa in a childhood photo. Just to confirm, John Robinson was a Santa. I know another person who sat on his lap for a similar photo, so it was probably him."
Em Schulz: Mmm.
Christine Schiefer: I like, I don't, I don't remember that, but I'm assuming somebody was like, I sat on Santa's lap anyway.
Em Schulz: Yeah. Yeah. No, I get it. Yeah. [laughter]
Christine Schiefer: "Now to my story regarding the creepiest quote unquote,"person" I have ever met." What the fuck does that mean? Okay. I'm scared already. Em, it's like the middle of the day. "I used to work in a facility that has housed Robinson on and off again." Oh my god. This is very intense. Okay. Uh, "specifically when he has court, he would go to and from this facility and his place on death row in the Kansas Department of Corrections. The facility that I worked in has very specific rules about types of clothing that someone can wear under their uniforms."
Em Schulz: Oh, okay. That makes the underwear thing makes sense. [laughter]
Christine Schiefer: Totally, totally. "When it comes to undergarments, they have to be all white, no logos, no colorful elastic bands, just white."
Em Schulz: Interesting.
Christine Schiefer: One of my, "one of my many responsibilities was approving under clothing, hygiene products, et cetera, that have come from other facilities for people to have when they go to the housing modules. Robinson is very, very manipulative. He is quiet, respectful, and kind. So long as he is getting what he wants, which he typically does, unless that is his legal team has brought him underwear with a black elastic band."
Em Schulz: Hmm.
Christine Schiefer: "I'm not sure at what point he requested his underwear, but my work partner and I got to explain to a convicted serial murderer that he would just have to free ball during his week in our facility."
[laughter]
Christine Schiefer: "'No, we will not give you these underwear. They are not approved and no one will approve them for you. No, not even our supervisor.' His grandfatherly demeanor literally melted away before our eyes. Although the man is very old, short and jaundiced. In that moment, I knew that I was seeing the eyes of the man who had placed eight women into barrels after killing them."
Em Schulz: [gasp] Euh.
Christine Schiefer: "They looked like the eyes of a shark. I don't typically drink, but that evening I am sure those eyes were why I drank." Eugh!
Em Schulz: Oh gosh.
Christine Schiefer: What the fuck? You don't think about the aftermath, like all the people who have to like have these encounters.
Em Schulz: Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: You know? Like that's.
Em Schulz: I can't imagine.
Christine Schiefer: Traumatizing in its own way.
Em Schulz: I had a friend in, umm, when I worked at the prop house, and her whole dream was to become a CO one day, and I was like, oh my God. Like, I can't, and she was like, uh, like a cute little girl. Like, I was like, I, I was like, I'm so scared for you. I like, I was like, I was like, the things that you're gonna see are gonna, they're already blowing my mind. And you haven't even seen them yet.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah, that's, uh, yeah. You should check in on her and see if she's doing okay.
Em Schulz: Yeah. [laughter] She's lovely. She's doing lovely. So.
Christine Schiefer: Oh, good. Good, good, good. Umm, "it says Em, congratulations on correctly pronouncing." Oh, for God's sake. O-L-A-T-H-E. Olathe, I don't have no idea. I'm gonna guess Olathe.
Em Schulz: Maybe.
Christine Schiefer: So you don't remember, right? You don't know?
Em Schulz: No. No.
Christine Schiefer: Damn it. Okay. So Em I think that, uh, S might take her Congratulations back, [laughter]
Em Schulz: I, I was gonna say, I, I could try to pronounce it now and I this would be the time I mispronounce it, Of course, so.
Christine Schiefer: That's true. Yeah. We don't wanna risk it. "Also, Johnson County Community College is nicknamed JCCC JCCC." Okay. If you ever wanna hear any.
Em Schulz: That's a, That's annoying.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah, that is annoying. "If you ever wanna hear any more stories from a former corrections worker yes. Feel free to ask. I'm very blessed to be out of that field. Although the number of murderers that I've passed in my lifetime will always remain significantly higher than six, XOXO S."
Em Schulz: Oh my God. Wow.
Christine Schiefer: Wow! That was really good. That was like deeply disturbing. Umm.
Em Schulz: And also my only regret in that story S is I don't understand at all why they are so picky about like, underwear with a black band versus like, what's the, what's the meaning of that? Like, is there a, like a...
Christine Schiefer: It's probably just one of those uniform rule. I mean, as someone who went and wore a uniform for so many years with like, arbitrary rules, I wonder if it's just how it, they just keep it really specific for.
Em Schulz: I guess so. My, 'cause my thought is like, if they're like, what if they're, it's like code, like, I don't know, like remember like the old, like, what is like the, the handkerchief code?
Christine Schiefer: Oh God. Yeah.
Em Schulz: Like colors mean things or something. I don't know. It could be that. I don't know. But anyway, other than that.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah.
Em Schulz: Perfect story.
Christine Schiefer: They're probably just very like no logos or anything. Like, it sounds like it's, you're probably right. Like to, and I think at least what they would always say for us with uniforms, it's like, to equalize everyone, right?
Em Schulz: Mmm. Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: Like, it's like you're not wearing like Gucci underwear, you know what I mean? Like, or like fancy underwear.
Em Schulz: Right?
Christine Schiefer: I don't know. Umm, wowza.Okay. Yeah. 'Cause we had that same rule with our socks. They had to be all white all the time. Not a, not a single thing had color on them. Umm, oh yeah.
Em Schulz: Weird.
Christine Schiefer: Eva said the Elastic is for, yeah, for like...
Em Schulz: Oh, so they can't use it to attempt suicide.
Christine Schiefer: But like, it sounds like they can have elastic, just not black elastic, yeah.
Em Schulz: Just not black. Okay.
Christine Schiefer: Like, it sounds like it has to be all white. Umm.
Em Schulz: Okay. Hmm.
Christine Schiefer: But anyway. Okay. So, yikes. That's all very scary. Uh, uh, also, the fact that you confirmed for us that in episode 62, listener episode 62, that person who wasn't sure if it was John Robinson. Was what...
Em Schulz: Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: That it was him. Probably. Like, that's also, I hope whoever wrote in that story gets to hear this as like, validation, you know.
Em Schulz: Some sort of like Yeah. You, you've been acknowledged too.
Christine Schiefer: You were, you were Right. Yeah.
Em Schulz: Yeah. Ooh. Well, thank you for your story. And also, sorry you had to see someone's eyes turn into shark eyes. That's crazy. That's.
Christine Schiefer: I don't think I wanna participate in that.
Em Schulz: No, I, I hope you had a real stiff drink that night. Like a stiff one.
Christine Schiefer: I do too. And if that's just a milkshake even that I hope had extra chocolate chips. [laughter]
Em Schulz: Yeah. Stiffed means stiff means whatever you want it to be.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah.
Em Schulz: Okay. This is from Morgyn who uses she/her pronouns. Thank you for normalizing pronouns, Morgan. And the subject line is My Teacher, The (attempted) Murderer.
Christine Schiefer: Oh, no.
Em Schulz: Are you kidding me with this? Okay, here we go. "Hello Eva, Em, Christine and the whole, and that's why we drink crew. I discovered your amazing show during quarantine, and it seriously kept me from going crazy. Thank you for all that you do." Very sweet. I wanna hear about this teacher now. Okay. "I have an absolutely insane true crime story for you. I'm gonna just jump right in. I go to a very small private school. I'm talking like 25 people in my graduating class and 300 students K-12." Oh, so did you go to my school? That's interesting. Uh, I totally know exactly the setup that we're working with here. "Anyways, this smallness provides for a very close and intimate environment where everyone pretty much knows everyone. So I had heard of Matt Richards, the seventh grade English teacher, and I was familiar with a few of his kids who went to the school there. Mr. Richards was not only a teacher, but also a youth pastor at a local church." Oh, so he's a pillar of the community, you say?
Christine Schiefer: Mm-Hmm. [laughter]
Em Schulz: "He was widely regarded as a great upstanding person. One might even say he was a pillar of the community." Okay. So you're on top of it.
Christine Schiefer: Em, you spoiled their line! [laughter]
Em Schulz: Uh, you know what, Morgyn's on top of it.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah.
Em Schulz: "So it was everyone, it was to everyone's shock when we heard that in the early morning hours of September 16th of this last year..."
Christine Schiefer: [gasp]
Em Schulz: "He had set his house on fire and attempted to murder his entire family."
Christine Schiefer: What?!
Em Schulz: All, "all five of his children..."
Christine Schiefer: [gasp]
Em Schulz: "Including his adult child who was home visiting and his wife were all asleep when he set the house on fire and started stabbing them."
Christine Schiefer: What.
Em Schulz: "Two of the family members called the police."
Christine Schiefer: The fuck.
Em Schulz: "One of them terrified... One of them terrified and saying that their father was chasing them with a knife and the other calling because she had been stabbed."
Christine Schiefer: [gasp]
Em Schulz: When police...
Christine Schiefer: What?
Em Schulz: "When police arrived, the wife and children were rescued and taken to the hospital. Mr. Richards was obviously immediately taken into police custody, and it turns out that this insane act was because of finances." So he was, what, what's it called? The, umm...
Christine Schiefer: [gasp] Oh yes. A family annihilator.
Em Schulz: Family annihilator. Mm-Hmm. Uh...
Christine Schiefer: Oh, that's so chilling because like, every time I hear one of those stories I'm like, Oh, it's like a famous one from decades ago. And now it's like, Oh, last year he fucking did this.
Em Schulz: Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: Oh, God.
Em Schulz: Richard was... "Richards was the sole financial supervisor in the family, and thus was in charge of all the family expenses. Apparently he was also the only person in the family aware of their financial situation because things had gotten so out of hand, and he was the only one who knew. Matt Richards tried to murder his entire family because they were going to be evicted from their home the next day..."
Christine Schiefer: [gasp] Oh!
Em Schulz: "And his family had not been told." So he just never, he didn't know how to, like...
Christine Schiefer: So they are just like having another night in the house, not thinking a thing...
Em Schulz: Yeah, but little...
Christine Schiefer: And all of a sudden, dad has a fucking knife.
Em Schulz: Little did they know they were supposed to leave the next day, and he was, he had too much of a man's ego and he was too proud, and he didn't wanna admit failure, so he was like, Well, they're just gonna die before they ever hear that I failed.
Christine Schiefer: What the fucking fuck? This is crazy.
Em Schulz: Mmm. Uh, "as you might have gathered from the, the title, his family survived his attacks. Thank God. Although two of his children and wife were taken to the hospital in critical condition, they all survived and made a full recovery physically at least. And this also hit my school as, uh, a whole pretty hard."
Christine Schiefer: Yeah.
Em Schulz: "Matt Richards and his wife were friends with most of the teachers and all of his kids had gone or were currently going to school there." If you got...
Christine Schiefer: Oh imagine, and then it's a double 'cause like, you know, the kids too. Oh, Jesus Christ.
Em Schulz: I mean, I can't imagine a, but I grew up in a school set up that exact same amount of people. And like, if one of the teachers did that, it would...
Christine Schiefer: It would've been...
Em Schulz: I mean it...
Christine Schiefer: The talk of everything forever.
Em Schulz: It would've...
Christine Schiefer: The school would have to end, 'cause like my school was bigger, but it was like 55 kids.
Em Schulz: Yeah, I mean it would've been like.
Christine Schiefer: Was that last small.
Em Schulz: It would've been, honestly, I can't imagine what the family went through. So I'm not trying to like, take from them, but as just like a student who would have a teacher around like that. 'Cause also like it's a school where there's, so, there's so few students that all the teachers like kind of go, like they teach, they teach you multiple years. It's not like just one class, one time. Like I had a teacher who taught me like 11 classes. If like I found out that he murdered somebody, like it would devastate me. I'd be like, this is a man who's been around in my life for so long and he's not even directly related to me. Like.
Christine Schiefer: And then the fact that like, you would know his kids too and like...
Em Schulz: Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: Know what they went through. I mean, Jesus Christ.
Em Schulz: Yeah. They're like, your schoolmates just went through like being stabbed and set on fire or their house on fire.
Christine Schiefer: And this guy was a fucking youth pastor. Are you kidding? I mean, it's like, it's like you can't write a more cliche story.
Em Schulz: I know.
Christine Schiefer: You know, I mean, Jesus Christ.
Em Schulz: Umm. "Anyway, if you've gotten this far, thank you so much for reading my awful horrific story. [laughter] Sorry, it was, sorry it was so long." Yeah. Please apologize about this story.
Christine Schiefer: This is not long. Also, I feel like people write like very long, which is fine too, but don't worry if you say it's sorry it's so long. It's usually not.
Em Schulz: Uh, and then we've got a link to the actual article. It's, uh The.
Christine Schiefer: Oh, okay. Well send me that. Send that to me. I guess I will be.
Em Schulz: KMBC, Shawnee, Kansas. Pastor Matthew Richards attacks family eviction.
Christine Schiefer: Oh, I guess I can Google it. Yeah. Wow. Okay. Ooh Jesus. These people. I mean, like we said, it makes sense why there are so few true story or true crime stories in our inbox.
Em Schulz: Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: 'Cause like It's not fun to be part of... Right. [laughter] Like it's not an enjoyable thing. Umm, ooh. Okay. So, uh, this is our last story, I think. Unless there's a bonus. I don't think there is today.
Em Schulz: I don't think there is.
Christine Schiefer: Okay. So this is our last one. This is from Marielle she/her, what a beautiful name. And the subject is how, and that's why. Oh, come on. Eva. Eva. Eva's like, just, just stroking our egos here. Ready?
Em Schulz: I'm ready.
Christine Schiefer: How? And That's Why We Drink probably saved me from being kidnapped: A love story?
Em Schulz: And you know what? I'll take it.
Christine Schiefer: Em's like, yeah, you're right. I did do that.
Em Schulz: You're. And you're welcome by the way. You are welcome.
Christine Schiefer: And I'm finally getting credit. [laughter] We're gonna make Em.
Em Schulz: Credit where credit is due. It took 400 episodes, but here we are.
Christine Schiefer: And you finally, you didn't even know it happened, but you sort of knew in the back of your mind that you deserve.
Em Schulz: I Knew, I knew.
Christine Schiefer: The medal for something [laughter] umm, "hello lovely people. I've been listening to your show for a year and especially love the Listener stories. I have a few paranormal and true crime, but this is the one I felt was most important to tell. When I was 22, I moved from a small town in New England to London, England." Oh my God. That would be so confusing. I'm moving to an old England from New England. [laughter] Like you're what? I'm moving from New England. Oh wait. Anyway.
Em Schulz: That's actually very funny. [laughter]
[laughter]
Christine Schiefer: It's like, it just trips me up.
Em Schulz: It's like moving to like, umm, like from like Jersey in the US like actual Jersey or like Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Christine Schiefer: New York to York. Yeah. I mean they're all based on Yeah. Places over there.
Em Schulz: Mexico to New Mexico. Any of the News [laughter] to go back to the old one.
Christine Schiefer: It's Like, can't they be more creative? But whatever. Umm, [laughter], "when I was 22, I moved from a small town in New England to London, old England." It doesn't say that, but I'm just for specificity. "I was newly single and using the apps to date. I had been on a few dates but hadn't met anyone I really connected with until I matched with this guy we'll call Alex. Alex was tall, had blue eyes and curly blonde hair and worked as an architect. He seemed genuine and straightforward and even though we hadn't chatted much, he seemed intent on meeting up. He picked a place and made a reservation, which I saw as a green flag. We agreed to meet for dinner on a Sunday night and I headed out excited. He texted me that he had arrived early and was waiting for me. I was running a few minutes late, so I responded I was gonna be there soon. As I approached the restaurant, a man walked up to me outside." Okay, I'm so scared. I like [laughter] I don't know why, these are scaring me so much.
Em Schulz: Like first of all you had to say was a man walked up to me and I was fucking on edge.
Christine Schiefer: We're all like, ah!! [laughter]
Em Schulz: Wait a minute, hang on. I did not sign up for that.
Christine Schiefer: Call that person's parents from earlier [laughter] because something is about to go wrong. Umm, buh, buh, buh... "A man walked up to me outside. He was tall with blue eyes and blonde hair, but did look quite like the picture on the profile. So when he started hitting on me, I initially brushed him off saying I was meeting someone inside. That's when he smiled and said, yes. He knew he was my date. I was so surprised. I said, oh, you must be Alex. Sorry I didn't recognize you with the hat. He laughed and said it was okay. We walked into the restaurant, he spoke to the hostess and we grabbed a table outside. It was January. So I thought this was a little weird." Oh. 'cause he knows the fucking real Alex is inside. He is like, we have to sit outside.
Em Schulz: Mmmm.
Christine Schiefer: Do you know what I mean?
Em Schulz: Mm-hmm.
Christine Schiefer: Like he has to hide her away otherwise, like if the real Alex comes in.
Em Schulz: Yeah. He went to go find her before she started looking around for someone. Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: [gasp] Okay. I was so surprised. I said, oh, you must be Alex. Okay. "He laughed and said it was okay. We walked in the restaurant, he spoke to the hostess. We grabbed a table outside. It was January. So I thought this was a little weird because he said he had made a reservation." Oh, good point. Good eye. See red flag. Red flag. Red flag. Then he asked.
Em Schulz: Thinking. Thinking, thinking.
Christine Schiefer: Thinking, thinking. "Then he asked if I wanted to stay here or go somewhere else." Before they ate. That is a red flag. I'm sorry. Huge.
Em Schulz: Massive red flag. Also, like the fact that that immediately also feels manipulative of like, I picked a really cold uncomfy place. So that way you would say, yes, let's go somewhere else.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah. Don't wanna leave? Yeah. That's such a good point. Like you're cornering someone into saying they're Leave.
Em Schulz: That's like, that's like if you put me in a place that like and intentionally turned off the air conditioning and you're like, don't you wanna go somewhere else? I'd be like, yes!
Christine Schiefer: Don't you wanna go on a bike ride for a fan experience outside on the trail [laughter]. Alone with me and my roller blades [laughter] Oh my God. Okay. "Alarm bells start going off in my head. I began asking him questions, but nothing lined up with his profile. His age, job, everything he said was off, and he kept suggesting we go somewhere else. Then I started," Ah! "then I started thinking about the book, the Gift of Fear that you talked about on the show, and my gut was screaming, something is wrong. Then it clicked. This wasn't Alex."
Em Schulz: Mmm.
Christine Schiefer: Oh my God, I have chills. "At this point, I had no idea if there was an Alex or if I had just been lured to this location by a fake profile."
Em Schulz: Gotta go to the bathroom. Gotta go to the bathroom. It's like, So you go inside.
Christine Schiefer: "Either way, I needed to get out of there. I made an excuse about needing to use the bathroom..." [laughter]
Em Schulz: Oh, damn it.
Christine Schiefer: "To which he looked me dead in the eye and said, 'You aren't coming back, are you?'" Ew!
Em Schulz: [gasp] Well, now that you said that motherfucker, of course I'm not coming back.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah, "I was terrified, but laughed it off and made some joke about leaving my coat as collateral. I then walked as," that's so smart. That's so smart.
Em Schulz: Good job.
Christine Schiefer: "I then walked as calmly as I could into the restaurant and made a beeline for the bartender, intending to ask for an angel shot and getting help."
Em Schulz: Mm-hmm.
Christine Schiefer: "But on my way over, I happened to look to my left and saw the real Alex sitting in the corner with two glasses of wine staring at me with a look of utter confusion. He had been waiting for me for 15 minutes. I ran to him, and even though we had barely spoken, I automatically broke down in his arms while trying to explain what had happened. He told me to sit down and he ran outside. I didn't know if real Alex was going to confront fake Alex or what, but real Alex came back in a minute later saying he suspected he might have been concealing a knife."
Em Schulz: [gasp]
Christine Schiefer: "After a few minutes, fake Alex left, and real Alex and I managed to put together the pieces of what had happened. We determined that this guy was a complete stranger to us both. He had targeted me, randomly attempted to pretend to be my date, and then tried to take me to a second location."
Em Schulz: Oh my God.
Christine Schiefer: "To this day," oh my God, oh, I'm so scared. "To this day, I have no idea if he was just a regular creep, trying to sleep with me while using a fake identity, which don't get me wrong, is borderline sociopathic at best, or if he intended to harm me. But either way, I think this is truly one of the scariest experiences of my life." Oh my God.
Em Schulz: Ugh.
Christine Schiefer: "I often think about how many women go missing under circumstances like that. And it literally just a random person on the street who took them no rhyme or reason. I'm so glad I," oh, I have so many chills. "I'm so glad I listened to that gut instinct and got myself out of that situation. For those wondering why I didn't call the police. Technically, he hadn't committed a real crime, and I didn't think there would be anything they could actually do. I hate that so many women are harassed and have no legal recourse since we all know that creeps like this only escalate. The real Alex ended up being a very sweet guy, and we are still dating."
Em Schulz: Aww.
Christine Schiefer: "So in the end, this rather traumatizing situation was our meet cute." End of submission. Wow. And this was May 29th 2023. So I'm hoping, hoping things are still going well. If, if not, I'm sorry. But it, I'm glad you guys, you know, I'm glad things ended up okay for a while at least.
Em Schulz: I Also, I also hope that, umm, real Alex, I mean, well not hope. What I like about real Alex is that I feel like there's so many guys that I, I just know kind of cursory in my life that if they heard that, they'd go, oh, really? There's someone out there that's kind of crazy. This fucking guy was like, I'm on it. He did. He was like, I don't even know you and I'm gonna, I was like, that's right. That's a good man.
Christine Schiefer: He's like, I'm gonna run out there and fucking give him a piece of my mind. Nevermind he has a knife. But.
Em Schulz: Yeah, at some point, [laughter] you gotta be smart about it. At some point, You gotta back away.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah, And I love that he also didn't turn into like full goon, like, I'm just gonna drag this guy by the, it's just like, both of you be safe. You know, this guy clearly Had bad intentions.
Em Schulz: Eva said Blaise energy, which, umm, it is, it is very Blaise energy. [laughter] Although I think Blaise would be, I think he would, uh, I don't know how he used to be a literal, what's it?
Christine Schiefer: A bouncer? Yeah.
Em Schulz: What was he, a bouncer. I think he would throw that guy around and then realize there was a knife and he'd go, uh, oh, now we're both running [laughter]
Christine Schiefer: Yeah, He, he'd break his other orbital bone in the process probably, [laughter] and we'd all be like, God damnit Blaise. Umm, and also, can you imagine some guy going, yeah, I'm Blaise like the fake Blaise. Like, good luck keeping that up.
Em Schulz: It's like, What are the odds they've heard... Yeah. What are the odds there are two Blaise Lampugnales and... [laughter]
Christine Schiefer: Yeah. It's zero. Actually. I'm pretty positive about that. Umm, but I did meet Blaise while on a Tinder date with someone else. So it kind of is like...
Em Schulz: Ohh.
Christine Schiefer: A happy version of that story. You know, like a less traumatic version. Umm.
Em Schulz: Yeah. Definitely less traumatic for all You know, the person you were supposed to meet was a...
Christine Schiefer: No. I still follow him 'cause he's very funny to like, I mean he's like, he was a very nice guy, but like, he was just like really big into golf. And my friends to this day are like, imagine if you had gone out with like, married Kevin, the golfer instead of Blaise. And I'm like, it's the world would be so different.
Em Schulz: So he's, He's your Michelle.
Christine Schiefer: He's my Michelle, yeah. A little bit except he slept through the date and I was like, fuck you. Oh. So, you know, I'm not like pining over him.
Em Schulz: Michelle was very lovely on our dates, it just wasn't gonna work. That's all.
Christine Schiefer: I have a, I do have a Michelle, his name's Ryan though. A different Ryan, not the Ryan from, anyway, it doesn't matter.
Em Schulz: What date. What date did you do with, with Ryan? What was your date?
Christine Schiefer: We went to get froyo and then we sat in the car and listened to Fall Out Boy.
Em Schulz: That's a good date.
Christine Schiefer: It was like very nice. I was like, you're a very like considerate, kind man. And now he's married and like just, they have like a very happy life. And I'm like, I just love to like pop in. We always like each other's photos, you know, where it's just like a very happy 'cause it was, it didn't go very far, you know?
Em Schulz: Yeah.
Christine Schiefer: And I was like, I'm not feeling it. And then, umm, anyway.
Em Schulz: I, Michelle and I, I think we went on, I, we think we only went on one date. We might've gone on two dates, but actually I think at the, neither of us were really feeling it. I think on, in hindsight, if I could redo that, when we said, no, this isn't gonna work, or she's texted me, she said, it's not gonna work. And I was already kind of feeling that too. I actually, in hindsight, I think I was like, my ego was like bruised and I was like actually like kind of mean with the text messaging. Like I feel.
Christine Schiefer: Well of course. Like it hurts your feeling like it's not a nice text to get. That's why I was so surprised when this guy wanted to like, keep like talking and like, you know, was just like, oh, it's okay. And I was like, that's nice. I would've been like, fuck you [laughter]
Em Schulz: I, I was, I, I mean, I didn't say fuck you, but I was definitely not who I like, like 32-year-old brain and like 23-year-old brain are like completely different.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah. Yeah.
Em Schulz: Umm, if I could go back when it ended, I would've been like, honestly, like I actually really do just wanna be friends. 'Cause I would've loved to stay in touch with her.
Christine Schiefer: That's kind of how it went with us. I was like, I think he was like, yeah, I'm with you. Like, let's just talk about Fall Out Boy and...
Em Schulz: Yeah. Yeah. [laughter] Anyway. Oh well.
Christine Schiefer: Oh, He was so nice. I should check on him. I should check on him.
Em Schulz: Hi Ryan.
Christine Schiefer: Why do I say check on him? [laughter] I'm like, I don't need to check on him. He's living a very successful and happy life, but, you know, check in, see how he's, what he's up to, you know?
Em Schulz: Uh, yeah, I gotta go check on Michelle later, I guess.
Christine Schiefer: Yeah, Yeah. Get back to me by the way, if you're like, who the fuck is Michelle? Uh, it was like a little bit, it was like, just like a bit in, in the episode like now as this comes out like a month ago. So you probably have no fucking clue what we're talking about. But, uh, I read a little blurb from our book, our upcoming book where Em, [laughter] mentioned that Michelle is their. I don't know what you'd call it.
Em Schulz: I, I it's like someone from your past who you just haven't deleted off Instagram.
Christine Schiefer: That you're still kind of just like slightly, you know.
Em Schulz: I, I Like, like I, I'm still engaged enough that when her stuff shows up on my story I'm like, oh, okay, that's cool.
Christine Schiefer: You're like intrigued. Yeah. Umm, the way that Em put it in the book was definitely very, umm, very hyperbolized I imagine. [laughter] So it was very funny. It wasn't just like, oh, it's someone I tangentially, it's like I made my whole personality following her every move [laughter] Like, so it's a lot scarier when you read it, but, umm, you know.
Em Schulz: I sound like actually now in hindsight, I kind of wish I edited that sentence. [laughter]
Christine Schiefer: No, it was funny and we all loved it and the TikTok actually did, you know, pretty well, so.
Em Schulz: Okay, great.
Christine Schiefer: Umm.
Em Schulz: Oh well, anyway, happy August everybody. I hope that, umm, you, you get all of your August dreams. I hope they all come true and I guess, We'll see you.
Christine Schiefer: Unless they're bad and then I don't want them to come true.
Em Schulz: Unless they have anything to do with me, and they're negative? Yeah. I don't want that. Umm.
Christine Schiefer: Unless you are the mob boss or that Santa Claus serial killer, then I don't want you to ever have anything happy in your life again.
Em Schulz: Exactly. Umm, and I guess we'll, we'll see you September 1st for even more listeners episodes or listeners stories.
Christine Schiefer: That's right and in between. You can listen to our show every Sunday and we're, one, two- two months away from October.
Em Schulz: Very excited about October and And.
Christine Schiefer: That's.
Em Schulz: Why.
Christine Schiefer: We.
Em Schulz: Drink.